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She was never, ever taking any portal that had stopovers ever again. Sure, their hosts had been great, she now played one hell of a mean game of croquet (it would have been two-time world champion except Reno had stolen one title from her on a technicality, damn him), but really, all being stuck in croquet hell for three years the local time had done was kill any momentum she'd had for saving the world.
Iris still came out of the portal swinging her mallet, just in case. (Look, before croquet hell there had been some much less friendly worlds out there and old habits died really hard.)
Nothing attacked her, though she did startle a man feeding his chickens as she stepped out into his yard. Ignoring his yelp, she glanced around their surroundings, her mind reaching out to judge any potential threats.
"Oh thank fuck," she said cheerfully. "We're someplace peaceful. I demand a shower!"
Sure, they'd have to figure out where and what reality they were in. But this was a start.
[For that title-stealing guy!
NOTE: The second thread has talk of torture, actual murder, torture, and blowing up a building in it.]
Iris still came out of the portal swinging her mallet, just in case. (Look, before croquet hell there had been some much less friendly worlds out there and old habits died really hard.)
Nothing attacked her, though she did startle a man feeding his chickens as she stepped out into his yard. Ignoring his yelp, she glanced around their surroundings, her mind reaching out to judge any potential threats.
"Oh thank fuck," she said cheerfully. "We're someplace peaceful. I demand a shower!"
Sure, they'd have to figure out where and what reality they were in. But this was a start.
[For that title-stealing guy!
NOTE: The second thread has talk of torture, actual murder, torture, and blowing up a building in it.]
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:13 am (UTC)Tseng sounded pained. So pained.
"Will that be all?"
Hated. That. Island.
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:15 am (UTC)So very independently.
"Stay out of trouble, yo." Then she hung up on him and burst into laughter.
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:16 am (UTC)"So," he said, "that went well?"
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:19 am (UTC)Tseng was never going to make that mistake again.
"And he's never met me as a four year old yet. Poor, deprived man."
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:21 am (UTC)Swore under his breath.
"... Bet we could spare everyone a lotta trouble just by hidin' a few books, yo."
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:24 am (UTC)Because, hey, she was down for that.
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:26 am (UTC)Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:26 am (UTC)Thanks for that, croquet land.
"I'm in. Let's trash it but good."
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:27 am (UTC)"An' if that donkey-laughin' lunatic is in there? We throw his ass into the mako."
Just putting that out there.
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:27 am (UTC)"Where is the mako, anyway? Underneath?"
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:28 am (UTC)Please don't think too hard about the tanks in the basement, Iris.
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:28 am (UTC)"Right," she said, a bit distantly. "Let's burn it all."
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:29 am (UTC)Cut the trouble off at the source.
Best chance they had yet, right?
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:29 am (UTC)Iris trailed behind him, her eyes hard.
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:30 am (UTC)Reno was ever so casually lighting up a smoke as they approached the mansion's front door. Tried the handle. Locked, of course.
Swiped his keycard.
Turk access. Ha.
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:30 am (UTC)"That's convenient," Iris said, smirking faintly. "And the place ain't deserted, though it ain't fully occupied either."
Just a heads up.
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:30 am (UTC)At all.
Even a little bit.
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:31 am (UTC)Iris. Iris, no.
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:32 am (UTC)"What, Smoochy? What, you thinkin' we should Smoochy Hojo?"
Reno would be up for giving Hojo the ol' Smoochy treatment.
Which was horrifying.
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:34 am (UTC)And absolutely terrible. In so, so many ways.
"We could even warn 'im, with one hangin' on a tree if we've got a day or so to spare. Like we always did with Tyler-sensei."
Only Smoochy had never been more than just a joke with him. For Hojo, it would be for real.
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:34 am (UTC)"Ah, memories."
A pause.
"You got a Smoochy hidden away in your back of tricks?"
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:35 am (UTC)And it wasn't like she spent her money on much else.
SO.
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:35 am (UTC)Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:38 am (UTC)A beat.
"If we get caught on the front step with a Smoochy costume I'm going to laugh forever."
And—
"I told you!" She held it up. And grinned.
It… it was not a nice grin, but Reno knew her not-so-nice bits, so that was fine.
Re: Nibelheim, Gaia, Thursday Morning
Date: 2019-04-11 01:39 am (UTC)"I vote," he mused, "instead of leavin' this as a warning, we stuff him in it when we do the job."
What was a little humiliation and torture between coworkers, right?
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